News: Open Letter, Blurbs, And Amazon Kindles Fanficdom Fire

A certain blind Socialist woman penned a letter to a bunch of German university students in 1933 who planned to burn some books, including hers. That was the year Adolf Hitler became the German Chancellor, by the way.

"History has taught you nothing if you think you can kill ideas," it begins. "Tyrants have tried to do that often before, and the ideas have risen up in their might and destroyed them."

Not that she's unaware of the issues behind it. "I acknowledge the grievous complications that have led to your intolerance; all the more do I deplore the injustice and unwisdom of passing on to unborn generations the stigma of your deeds."

That this blind lady sees the value of and appreciates what some of us take for granted: ideas and letters on a page should shame book-burners everywhere and through the ages.

What? You've never heard of Helen Keller?

Okay, what else?

• Amazon has started a publishing model to crowdsource fanfic. Authors Malinda Lo and John Scalzi has some thoughts about it - few of them good.
• Beth Hayden over at Copyblogger on why writing is scary, and why writers must write through fear. "If we let fear stop us, our content will have no spark, no life. And everything we write will be completely unremarkable."
• "Do snippets of inflated praise on dust jackets make any difference to potential readers standing in a bookstore? Is anyone buying Benjamin Percy’s werewolf novel, 'Red Moon,' because John Irving called it 'terrifying'?" Book blurbs are "terrifying", Ron Charles suggests.
• How a writer used Wikipedia to buff his ego and settle scores - and cast more doubt upon Wikipedia as an online info source.
• After doing some homework, restaurant critic Jay Rayner eats crow over a past outburst over food miles. This is why Rayner deserves respect, even if he is a little shouty and abrasive.
• Why literary criticism still matters. I know I'm beating a dead horse.
• A farmer in the US explains certain questions you shouldn't ask at farmers markets in the US.
• Nationalist politics in China's film industry is kind of ... worrying.
• Manila's city chairman roasts Dan Brown for calling the capital the "gates of hell" for its "six-hour traffic jams, suffocating pollution [and] horrifying sex trade" in his latest book, Inferno.
  
  Some commenters on the original news report, however, say that Brown, who is reputed to be fond of re-interpreting history and science to suit his plots, was kind of spot on about Manila in that book.
  
  So, I guess he won't be helping much with Filipino tourism as much as, say, Florentine or Venetian tourism.

Lost, Then Found

first published in The Star, 26 May 2013


♪ ... we are poor little lambs who have lost our way
Baa, baa, baa! ♫

In those lines from the opening sequence of the old TV series Baa Baa Black Sheep (aka, the Black Sheep Squadron), one feels all that's heroic, heartwarming, harrowing and horrific in World War II. The book I'd finished in just one night had the same effect, albeit with a few chuckles.

While rummaging through old newspaper archives, former journalist, and now professor of journalism at Boston University, Mitchell Zuckoff uncovered lots of hidden gems. One of these became Lost In Shangri-La, an airplane crew's story of survival and salvation in the dense jungles of Papua New Guinea during World War II (which I reviewed in 2011).

Now Zuckoff is back with another, similar epic: Frozen In Time. This time, he became more involved with the story he was writing, going so far as to visit plane-crash sites in freezing cold weather and giving a stranger his credit card. The things authors do to write books these days....

Greenland, according to Zuckoff, was a source of natural cryolite, used in processing the aluminium that went into American and Canadian warplanes during World War II. That, and Greenland's potential as a staging area for a blitzkrieg-style attack on Europe, led to the US setting up bases there.

Greenland was a tough posting. It's cold, of course, and layers of snow hide deep gaps in the glaciers underneath. When fog or a storm rolls in and covers the horizon, the ground becomes indistinguishable from the sky. Even experienced aviators can't tell which way is up when caught in this hazardous phenomenon, known appropriately as "flying in milk".

This book is about not one but three plane crashes. In 1942, the crash of a C-53 Skytrooper in Greenland sent planes in the air in a search operation. One of those planes, a B-17 bomber, crashed while searching for the C-53. Much of the story revolves around the crew of this B-17.

Unlike Zuckoff's other war tale, some of the people involved perished trying to rescue the victims. One of the rescue planes that didn't make it home was a Grumman J2F-4 piloted by Coast Guard members Lieutenant John Pritchard Jr and Radioman First Class Benjamin Bottoms. The plane, also known as the "Duck", crashed while carrying a crew member of the crashed B-17.

Zuckoff not only unearthed the story of the three planes and their crew, he also learned about the people who were trying to bring the Duck and its crew and passenger home. To write a complete account of the three plane crashes, the author joined the 2012 quest to find the Duck.

As I see it, the "Duck Hunt", as the search was called, was primarily driven by two figures. Zuckoff is wary of photographer and explorer Lou Sapienza whose "default posture" reminds the author of a certain windmill-tilter, especially after Sapienza gets him to pay for a shared taxi. And "Don Quixote" wanted Jon Krakauer (of Into Thin Air fame) to write this story. The other guy, retired Coast Guard captain Tom King collects Coast Guard relics to preserve them and keep them away from profiteering wreck-hunters. As Grumman Ducks were rare WW2 planes, the Greenland Grumman may be worth several million.

Tom King has another, more personal reason: "I don't want to see John Pritchard's wallet being sold on eBay."

Those who read Lost In Shangri-La can expect a similar kind of narrative from Zuckoff here, except with even more testosterone. Imagine Band Of Brothers set in an icy landscape and made by National Geographic. There's plenty of drama to keep the pages turning, and heaps of background information to slow things down, too. Zuckoff has done his homework, as attested to by over 20 pages of source references.

As we follow the travails of the B-17 crew and their rescuers amidst dangers that lurk in the white, we are taken back to each major character's beginnings in relatively fairer climes and times and told how they got to Greenland and, later, learn of their ultimate fates.

Back in the present, we see how the search is hampered by inaccurate maps, a lack of thorough planning, expertise and funding, a clash of personalities, and the harsh Greenland winter.

Zuckoff helps out by giving Sapienza cash and, later, his credit card number. "In no time, Lou (Sapienza) blows past the limit I set." The author's sacrifices provide much of the humour in the latter-day part of this saga, for which I was grateful.

Too many names to mention this time around, as we go from the crash victims' makeshift weather-beaten shelters against the cold to the meeting rooms where creases in the Duck Hunt are being ironed out and, finally, what may be the Duck's final resting place.

Throughout his potentially quixotic mission to bring us the tales of these brave men – in the past and present – Zuckoff is at times asked, "How does the book end?"

Not in the way you would think. History buffs, however, will thank him for getting this story out of the ice.


02/01/2014: Amended this bit to clarify exactly who perished; people died in the plane crash in Lost in Shangri-La, not the rescuers.

---

Frozen in Time

An Epic Story of Survival and a Modern Quest for Lost Heroes of World War II

Mitchell Zuckoff
HarperCollins (2013)
391 pages
Non-fiction
ISBN: 978-0-06-226937-9

Reading 'Readings' Again

first published in The Malaysian Insider, 23 May 2013


For reasons I'll only divulge over coffee, I haven't gotten involved in anything related with Readings since 2011. But is the latest release of Readings from Readings 2 that bad?

Not really.


Collective camaraderie
Local poet, writer, and lecturer Bernice Chauly founded Readings about eight years ago. The "live" reading event, which usually takes place on the last Saturday of each month, is currently held at Seksan's, a house in Lucky Garden in Bangsar that landscape architect Ng Seksan turned into an art gallery and office.

When Bernice could no longer manage Readings, it was bequeathed to Sharon Bakar, a writer, editor and creative writing teacher. Readings has hosted more than 400 writers, from the man-on-the-street types to names such as Tan Twan Eng, Tash Aw, Hishamuddin Rais, Kam Raslan and Preeta Samarasan.

I've lost count over the number of Readings sessions I've attended, but it must've been somewhere between 10 and 12. Most of these took place on warm, often muggy Saturday afternoons. Trees provided little shade, and the breeze mostly stayed away.

The crowd is a mix as eclectic as the reader line-ups. Some were new faces who have never been published before, let alone read their work aloud in front of strangers, some of whom are formidable figures in writing and publishing.

For new or unpublished writers, Readings can be a launchpad to greater heights. Simply showing up and, maybe, buying a copy or five of the books on sale helps.

Because of the current state of the local writing pool, seasoned Malaysian writers, editors and publishers are eager to share and help grow local talent ― and they should be! Every achievement, every success story, no matter how small, is celebrated.


From Seksan's to the shelves
Coming out of over eight years of Readings, this second volume in the Readings from Readings series more or less lives up to its billing as a collection of new writing, and it's a gorgeous production, thanks to writer, poet and artist Shahril Nizam's unique touch.

Reports of their suckiness were greatly exaggerated

Many contributions are short, written as they were for their 15-minute time slot. Crafting exceptionally effective and powerful short stories is hard, so, kudos to those who managed to pull it off in this collection, like Chuah Guat Eng, who manages to channel the tortured mind of a child whose ignorance sparks a terrible tragedy.

For me, Fadz Johanabas's is arguably among the better pieces, as is Amir Hafizi's outlandish, rib-tickling paean-of-sorts to his dad which, one hopes, is not "fiction."

Even without the cadence of her calm voice, Lilian Tan's poems ― including the one about a stubborn raindrop ― manage to retain some of their potency. And how not to pity the poor girl in Cynthia Reed's tale of a makeover that ends badly?

This volume overall is a slight improvement over the first, with a good mix of new and familiar names. This would also mean that more will be expected from the third book, if it comes out.


Perils of podium to print
Translating the creative energy from people into a publication can be a dicey affair. There's plenty of that energy coming out of Readings, and even more potential. The people behind Readings and CeritAku are justifiably proud of what's coming out of their years of toil, and it's natural for them to feel it's all worth sharing.

As a collection of stories, it's lovely and well-crafted. No doubt a lot of work went into it, perhaps to make it representative (somewhat) of what Readings is and what comes out of it.

But like many multi-author short story collections, R from R 2's fruit-salad nature and the brevity of many of the contributions might also work against it. Not every writer's talent and voice can be effectively conveyed by a shortie.

In spite of frequent references to Malaysian identities, issues and idiosyncrasies, the "diversity of genres" from this "eclectic bunch" of writers is vast. Like a box of chocolates, certain flavours will be preferred over the others.

And it's likely that the newcomers' efforts will be unfairly judged and compared with those by the more well-known names, diminishing this book' significance as a showcase of new (read: previously unpublished) writing.

Putting poems in the mix without some form of segregation reflects the inclusive, freeform nature of the line-ups, but such a scheme doesn't translate well into print and the random appearance of genres tends to affect the reading momentum.

We can probably expect more Readings from Readings volumes, as the event marches towards its ninth year. Regardless of the reception given to this labour of love by the Readings people, they should be lauded, at the very least, for their efforts to bring the balmy, lit-filled weekend afternoon atmosphere at Seksan's to the world at large.

---

Readings from Readings 2

New Writing from Malaysia, Singapore and Beyond

edited by Bernice Chauly and Sharon Bakar
Word Works Sdn Bhd (2012)
206 pages
Fiction
ISBN: 978-967-10292-1-3

Muslim Culinary Heritage

Proofreading this book was hard. I kept losing focus - and getting hungry.

The descriptions of food, ingredients and the chefs who made them kept returning me to my younger days and the nasi kandar I knew as a child in Penang: white rice, half a hard-boiled egg, and a chicken leg or breast, slathered with a spicy brown gravy that had the texture of sawdust.

But the flavours, the aroma, the spice, and the heat! I remember being hooked on it, and eagerly awaiting my father's return from work and the spicy package he'd bring home for himself and those in the family who could take the heat.

From the book: "Classic" nasi kandar which resembles my
childhood memories of it

I haven't had anything like it since arriving in KL about two decades ago. I don't know if it's still there...

Right, the book.

Usually, chefs write cookbooks, while academics write papers. It's perhaps the first time I've seen an academic write a (sort of) cookbook. Not credible? Not if the academic also cooks the food she writes about.

Wazir Jahan Karim, economic anthropologist, Distunguished Fellow and Founder of the Academy of Socio-economic Research and Analysis (ASERA) and Life Fellow of Clare Hall at the University of Cambridge, is also a Jawi Peranakan, one of the many Indian Muslim communities along the Straits of Malacca.

Heir to her mother's culinary repertoire, Wazir Jahan is also said to host really great dinner parties. It was during one such dinner that a guest, impressed by the food and table setting, suggested that she write and publish something about both.

Pictures from the book: murtabak maker (left) and guy with
sup kambing and roti Benggali

She has delved into the historical, cultural and societal aspects of her family's cuisine and, perhaps, found more than she needed. The result is Feasts of Penang: Muslim Culinary Heritage.

Her book, which took almost a year to finish, was based on favourite hereditary foods from Penang's oldest families. "There are many anecdotes in the book which trace the history and origin of these Muslim heritage foods within families and how they were invariably linked to the spice trade in Southeast Asia from as early as the 14th century," she told the New Straits Times.

From the book, also an old favourite: fried fish roe - delicious, but not healthy

Penang's 18th- and 19th-century Jawi Peranakan and Jawi Pekan communities were mostly English-educated. The women were leaders and educators who also did charity work. Using their unique culinary alchemy, they brought crowds to charity bazaars.

From her impressive CV and bits and pieces from this book, it looks like the author is keeping that tradition going.

She stresses that the book is "not a text on the 'anthropology of food' or 'history of food'", but "a narrative and personal search into Malay and other sub-cultures of Muslim cookery in Penang and to a lesser extent, the northwestern states of Peninsular Malaysia" that "tries to capture, through memory and anecdotes, the kind of plural Muslim culture of food which has emerged in this region."

It's also a huge book, loaded with facts about the Straits Muslim communities and their cuisine - the better to sate hungry minds and whip up appetites for the food itself. The author's own memories of food, family, community and heritage, along with an occasional dash of humour, add a personal touch.

Famished types will salivate at pictures of some of the dishes inside. The cuisine is divided into several categories, including herbs and spices, breads and breakfasts, rice, nasi kandar (so good, it seems, that it has its own category), cakes and puddings, and bridal table spreads.

From simple starters and cakes to complicated stews and curries, there is enough in the book to keep one occupied - whether one really want to try his hand at the recipes, or to reminisce wistfully on a weekend afternoon.

Feasts of Penang: Muslim Culinary Heritage is available at all major bookstores. The book is jointly sponsored by Think City Sdn Bhd, ASERA and the Al-Bukhary Foundation.

---

Feasts of Penang

Muslim Culinary Heritage

Wazir Jahan Karim
Nurilkarim Razha (culinary editor)
Rashidah Begum Fazal Mohamed (editor)

MPH Group Publishing
307 pages
Non-fiction
ISBN: 978-967-415-879-8

Buy from Kinokuniya | MPHOnline.com

News: Inferno in Hell's Kitchen As Farm-Lit Takes Off

Eight of the worst sentences in Dan Brown's Inferno will chagrin those who were hoping he'd dial down his signature tell-not-show style. But that's what sells millions, so why fix something that ain't broken?

While we're on the subject of 'bad' writing: Have some absurd quotes from Guy Fieri's book. ..."Fierifying".


Meanwhile:

• Josh Ozersky's take on food writing/criticism can also apply to book reviews. Plus, bacon and grilling tips.
  
  Update: A rebuttal of Ozersky's suggestion that restaurant critics serve a more selfish agenda. "[Restaurant] critics, at least the serious ones, try not to pal around too much with chefs they might review," says Joshua David Stein, writer and editor of and contributor to all sorts of publications. "They aren’t the chef’s friend. They aren’t the chef’s enemy. They are the reader’s advocate."
• Four kinds of author appearances, defined. Not every author wants to do a 'reading'.
• Young adult novels are getting more sophisticated - and reaching more adults.
• Goodbye, chick-lit; hello, farm-lit - where "a roll in the hay" can take place in real hay. Hey, hey, hay.
• Book-hoarding behaviour now has a name: "tsundoku". Too close to 'tsundere' for comfort.

...What the heck did I just call this update?

Lit And The Law Of The Jungle

Lots have been said about the review system on Amazon. It's not perfect, and next to no monitoring means all sorts of interesting input- (OMGZ, EA Poe's "The Raven" repurposed into a review of Tuscan Whole Milk!

But takedowns of products, driven by outrage or money, happen just as often. Maybe more often. More odious is the hiring of faceless online mercenaries in the effort. The bile in your veins must be really thick for you to do that.

As a reviewer, I have a personal beef with those who use feedback platforms in such a manner. Flooding a product's feedback section with lazy, lying, ill-informed 'reviews' - without even a look at the actual product - is destructive, unproductive and grossly unjust.

On top of it all, they're unconvincing and, in a way, taints what honest reviewers are doing.

I got a copy of the book to see if it was that bad. The one-star 'reviews' of it? All bull.

It is not an awful book, though I wouldn't call it great.

It is not a "far-left ultra-liberal" socialist manifesto. (What.)

It does not disrespect the Boston bombing victims. (What the heck?)

I've proofed even more error-ridden stuff.

The neurosurgeon in the book should sue for libel.

And would anyone with half a brain know if he was insulted?

And isn't it odd that some of the Amazon 'reviewers' five-starred almost the same things?

Only one error stood out after a casual pass: a name in a story appears to have two spellings. Several pieces feel rushed, written for its own sake with no apparent denouement. And several stories need better paragraphing - except maybe one.

I'm not defending the book or the publishers as much as I'm venting my spleen against the practice. I have made my feelings known about Amazon's feedback/review 'system', as well as 'reviewers' who think the number of posts on Tripadvisor, etc translate into power and authority. Unregulated feedback/review platforms are like mosquito-breeding swamps that need to be drained.

News: MPH Warehouse Sale, Grammar, And Dan Brown's Inferno

MPH Distributors is having its annual blowout sale from 21 to 26 May, 8am to 6pm at its premises at 5, Jalan Bersatu, Section 13/4, 46200 Petaling Jaya. Come one, come all, and avoid all that post-GE13 unpleasantness.

And glad to see that Fixi is doing well.


Elsewhere:

• "...it haunted my office for a decade in the form of a file cabinet labelled "DAB" – the Damned Africa Book. Into that cabinet I stuffed notes, clippings, photographs, character sketches, plot ideas, anything that struck me as relevant to the huge novel I wished I could write. I did not believe I would ever be writer enough to do it. So the files grew fat, in proportion to my angst about the undertaking." Barbara Kingsolver talks about that "Damned Africa Book", The Poisonwood Bible.
• "Tourism is down in Florence by 10%, and if this new book does well, we will get that 10% back." Eugenio Giani, head of the city council of Florence, Italy, is apparently banking on Dan Brown's latest book, Inferno, to set the city's tourism industry ablaze. Never thought of Brown as a tourist site resuscitator.
  
  Speaking of Dan Brown: seems the translators working on Inferno had a taste of Hell because the publisher(s) wanted to keep a lid on the book before its simultaneous worldwide release. It's just one of some crazy ways publishers enforce a code of silence.
  
  Before I forget: here's twenty of St Dan's worst sentences, just in case you're wondering what to expect in Inferno - thank you, Daily Telegraph. After all, dude sells millions. Maybe half of that are editors and English teachers looking for case studies.
• Candace Bushnell, author of Sex and the City, became a victim of a hacker who posted excerpts of her new novel online. Someone suggested (forgot who) that Bushnell use the hacking as publicity for said book but, hey, we can't all be like Paulo Coelho.
  
  Bushnell's case, however, is nothing compared to the angry reactions to how Charlaine Harris ended the Sookie Stackhouse saga. Death threats and suicide threats over the ending of a book? SRSLY?
• The art of translation, examined via the response to Haruki Murakami's latest.
• How different is book-signing in the digital age, and are signed e-books just as much relics as signed hardcopies? (the short answer is "yes", I think). Also: a brief history of the pantelegraph.
• How John Scalzi packs for a three-week book tour. Even then, he admits he's no expert. Mary Robinette Kowal can pack as many days worth of clothing into a carry-on as I can, and still — unfathomably — have space for a ball gown."
• Dude's writing about comics, but he brings up a good question: Will fretting over production details mean that professionals in publishing - editors, writers, book-makers, etc - will enjoy reading less?
• The Guardian asks, "Is good grammar still important?" Comedian and author Charlie Higson spars with Daily Mail columnist and sketchwriter Quentin Letts over whether the grammar Nazis have had their day. Maybe some rules need not be adhered to, but here are some grammar rules 'everyone' should follow. Or not.
  
  Recent news about the ancient Egyptian pyramids makes the case for some flexibility in language. Thanks to their precise engineering, the expansion and contraction of the limestone blocks due to temperature changes led to the outsides cracking and eventually crumbling. Without room for improvisation, language may end up the same.
• 'Discarded lines' from Robert Palmer's "Simply Irresistable". Sounds like parody because ♪ the writer sounds irascible, yeah yeah... ♫
• This 7-minute, research-based workout plan leaves you with almost no excuse not to exercise. And here's a handy guide on storing your favourite foods. What to keep on the shelf, fridge or freezer. Not exactly book-related, but handy.

Kampung Boey Abroad

Last January, I received an e-mail that began thus:

my name is boey, and a friend referred me to your blog, where i ninjaed this address.

i'm best known for my works on foam cups since they went viral 4 years ago, and ive amassed quite a following on my blog that i update 6 times a week, and i am actively promoting the book now, especially so in asia, because it is rather disheartening that my artwork is better known in other parts of the world, but hardly at all back home.

I ignored all the typos in the e-mail for some reason and looked at the attachments. It was good, like a rough version of Lat's Kampung Boy, but I had a feeling we wouldn't be able to publish it for him.

I replied, and then forwarded the e-mail to the distributors' office upstairs. He had to self-publish in the end, but at least they would help him bring his book into the local market - if they agreed to.

I don't think anybody saw what came next.

A year later, the book has gone for five reprints - with 10,000 copies sold or in circulation; made the best-seller lists of major bookstores; and landed the author spots on TV, radio and the papers, in print and online.

All of that happened because a) he made a good product and believed in it and b) kept knocking on doors. We just so happened to be around and ready to give him a break.

Perhaps it was for the best that he self-published it. Otherwise I would've been the one doing his author's note and wouldn't have let him call himself "handsome", even if many readers think so.

I'd like to think that this was a modest success story. As with all success stories, it's the protagonist who sets things in motion with the first step.

---

When he was a kid...

first published in The Malaysian Insider, 13 May 2013

Childhood stories. Most people wrote theirs; fewer have drawn theirs. But one thousand words is not easy to write, and a picture does not have to be too detailed to tell a good story.

Boey Cheeming's collection of hand-drawn childhood stories, When I Was A Kid, is an example of how simple lines and words are all you need to tell a tale.

Years back, I came across what looks like the blog of a young lady's (mis)adventures in life and love, comprising mostly of simple single-frame comics.

The artwork in Boey's collection is not much different. His avatar is easier to draw, however, and though his collection has more text, his roughly drawn figures fill in when words fail.

One should note that he's not afraid to speak or draw his mind. Nor is he inclined towards political correctness. Despite being advised to choke back the F-word numerous times during his book tours in Southeast Asia, one or two managed to slip past - without incident, I should add.

And some wouldn't like what he had in mind for his mom in her old age, though I personally saw one fan guffaw at it. His mom has read the book and is fine with it.

Okay, maybe she's not fine with everything

I guess there's a certain appeal in his honesty and irreverence, much of it all too apparent in his blog, where his own (mis)adventures continue online.

Even the non-graphic blog entries, all handwritten and scanned, are just as expressive. The handwriting, crossouts and assorted scribbles hints at a tendency to wear one's heart on a sleeve - or one's brain on a T-shirt.


Kampung Boey abroad
Malaysian by nationality, Boey went to school in Singapore before flying off to the States to do advertising at the Academy of Art University (AAU) in San Francisco.

He moved to computer animation, and eventually landed a job at Blizzard Entertainment(!) where he was an animator on projects such as Diablo II (!!) and Diablo III (!!!)

Before he found fame with his graphical autobiography, one of our country's crouching tiger/hidden dragon was known for gorgeous, intricate pieces painstakingly inked on styrofoam coffee cups with markers, from the first stroke to the last ("Wayward Boey comes home - for a short while", 02 August 2012).

He has since quit his job, and gone on a book tour, giving talks, meeting fans and signing copies of his book. He currently resides in Oakland, California and is working on his next book.


Poignant and punchy penstrokes
Though these are Boey's recollections, he promises that they will have you reminiscing about your childhood. Do you want to, though? It can be a tough question, and not just for those with difficult childhoods.

For most of us, when we were kids, childhood is a mixed bag, like Forrest Gump's "box o' choc'lutz" that should be partaken slowly and in small bites. Who knows what emotions a particular scene would evoke?

I've been to shops that looked like this

The sight of a well-drawn old-school Chinese-run sundry shop, for instance, returns the smell of dried goods, old rice and stale air to your nostrils. Then your eyes threaten to spill when you think of the days you badgered your parents for snacks or trinkets your adult self now recognises as unhealthy or frivolous indulgences - and feels awful for.

Other scenes from the author/artist's childhood seem familiar as well. Forced to do unsavoury chores? Yes, though burying dead birds is a breeze compared to whacking a trapped rat to death, which is harder than it sounds.

Fought with your younger sibling and got thrashed for it afterwards? Been there, done that. Felt your other talents were underappreciated because of your mediocre academic performance? So did I.

And hey, my grandma smoked too.

But it's not all about his parents or other people. Boey pokes fun at himself as well. In one chapter, he mimes kung-fu moves and gets teased by his mom. Another chapter sees his chubby tween self climb out of a pool with all the grace of a manatee. Getting chased and pecked by angry geese can be a harrowing experience for a kid, but he manages to make us laugh at that.

A friend who probably grew up a thousand miles away from any large body of water gawped incredulously when Boey told her that he used to believe that there were sharks in a swimming pool.

"I was a KID," Boey said defensively.

Weren't we all?

Boey calls his book a time-travel device and, in a way, it is. Combined with hindsight, a wry eye and the impious touch of his pen, he revisits his "mundane" growing-up years and manages to make it more interesting.

It's nice to think that, as he takes his trips back through time, the book becomes a prism through which he examines himself to see how much has changed since he was a kid and whether there's still room for improvement.

If it could do the same for those who read it, all the better.


When I Was A Kid is available at RM34.90 a copy and is available at all major bookstores. When I Was A Kid 2 is being Kickstarted.

---

When I Was A Kid

written and published by Cheeming Boey (2010)
183 pages
Non-fiction
ISBN: 978-0-9849786-0-1

Shadows, Secrets and Starstone Spears

We wanted to get this out sometime last year, but one or two issues held it back. The art shift, for one.

Books one and two of The Jugra Chronicles

We couldn't get the illustrator for the first book to work on the second, but isn't the cover as lovely?

I've seen this kind of face before. Where, I wonder?

The long-awaited release of the second volume of The Jugra Chronicles begins three years after Miyah and village outcast Rigih rescue the former's younger brother from the clutches of a forest demon. Miyah, however, is seized by the demon instead and suffers a cruel curse.

Three years later, the denizens of Miyah's village, Tapoh, have largely moved on from the incident, though Rigih and Miyah's brother Bongsu remain the most affected by her disappearance. Especially the latter, who has been plagued by dreams and memories of things he doesn't remember experiencing.

An illustration from the book

One day, Malidi, younger daughter of the village chieftain and one of Miyah's friends, finds a bracelet of glass beads in the jungle. The item horrifies her sister and mother; they now believe that she, by picking it up, is under the spell of the penyamun, dreaded marauders who use black magic to ensnare their victims.

She is placed in confinement while a way to break the spell is devised. Like Miyah before her, she defies the wisdom of her elders and escapes, taking the beads with her. Then, she vanishes. Her disappearance leaves a cloud hanging over Tapoh, on top of rumours of a strange man-beast prowling the jungle with the penyamuns.

More potential trouble comes in the form of the Dutch and their interest in the natural resources of Borneo - a worry for the royal house of Tanjungputra.

Meanwhile, Bongsu's visions intensify, even as he struggles to forget his abduction and imprisonment by the forest demon. Heeding the advice of Nenek Kebaya, he seeks out Rigih, convinced that the time has come to find his sister and put the demon to rest.

It's not long before Rigih and Bongsu are joined by the young warrior Temaga and the headstrong Suru on their quest, which will take them to a hidden valley where the secrets of the man-beast, the dreaded forest demon and the Jugra bloodline, and the truth behind the penyamun will be revealed.

Who is Jugra, the legendary shaman and what are his connections with Rigih, Miyah, Bongsu, Nenek Kebayan, the demon, and the mysterious woman with the tattooed arms? Will they overcome the jungle's mortal and supernatural threats to find and rescue Miyah?


The second volume in The Jugra Chronicles, Rigih and the Witch of Moon Lake, will soon be available at all major bookstores.

Material for this series is by Tutu Dutta-Yean, whose repertoire includes fairy tale collections such as Timeless Tales of Malaysia, Eight Jewels of the Phoenix, Eight Fortunes of the Qilin, and Eight Treasures of the Dragon.

Art for this book is by prolific children's book illustrator Tan Vay Fern, whose vast body of work includes Hayley's Vegemania Garden and Hayley's Fruitastic Garden by Mohana Gill; The Zany Zebra, The Ugly Green Umbrella and The Xenophobic Xylophone by Wong Ching Hsia; and Dutta-Yean's Eight Treasures of the Dragon. Also, the cover for Wee Su May's Nine Little People Who Lived in a Chest.

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The Jugra Chronicles: Rigih and the Witch of Moon Lake

Tutu Dutta-Yean
illustrated by Tan Vay Fern

MPH Group Publishing
148 pages
Fiction
ISBN: 978-967-415-085-3

Buy from MPHOnline.com

Late News: Bestseller Figures, Rejection, And A Publishing Miracle

Last week's general elections was definitely eventful, but it seems a new circus is forming around the aftermath. So I dropped the ball on what's been happening in the book/publishing thing. On top of several planned articles and work.

• Another reality check for self-publishers.
• Rejection sucks. So take that rejection letter, shove it and carry on writing.
• How many copies makes a self-published book a bestseller? Some success stories share some figures.
• "...simply publishing e-books is already a thing of the past...". The Rumpus interviews writer Miracle Jones.
• Microsoft is thinking of buying Nook after the B&N division was sort of spun off from the main retail arm. If this sale goes through, TechCrunch thinks B&N and Amazon might as well stop competing over e-books.

A New Quill For A New Year

They said they were revamping Quill into a lifestyle mag. However, I wasn't quite prepared for the new look, which was finally revealed last week.

The new Quill, not quite like the old Quill

It's like watching your prim-and-proper little girl grow up into Lady Gaga.

While book-related pieces will have a place in the 'new' Quill, expect to see more everyday stuff behind the covers. As this incarnation of Quill evolves, we hope to feature more great stuff as the mag finds its voice (because now everybody can contribute, not just authors and book people).

What you'll find in this issue:

• With her new guide book on how to be a successful model, Amber Chia pays it forward. Find out how she made her name.
• Stephen HB Twinings of Twinings Tea, talks about the beverage and the company, and shares his reading habits.
• A note from Datuk Abdul Kadir Jasin of Berita Publishing on Tun M's Blogging to Unblock: A Citizen's Rights.
• An excerpt from Adibah Amin's As I Was Passing II: "A laughter of eggs" and other odd-sounding collective nouns.
• Chef Malcom Goh from AFC's Back to the Streets re-invents several hawker delights.
• Strategies to start saving for one's retirement, from Yap Ming Hui.
• An excerpt from Only 13 the "sordid sexposé" about a young victim of Thailand's sex industry.

And more. It's still RM8 per copy and available at all major bookstores and news stands.

News: Book Snobbery, Copyshop Capers, And "Am I Good Enough?"

Among 30 things to tell book snobs:

People should never be made to feel bad about what they are reading. People who feel bad about reading will stop reading.

...Stories, at their essence, are enemies of snobbery. And a book snob is the enemy of the book.

I suppose it's a fair point, but a world without book snobs can be potentially dreadful. Another point:

...Snobbery leads to worse books. Pretentious writing and pretentious reading. Books as exclusive members clubs. Narrow genres. No inter-breeding. All that fascist nonsense that leads commercial writers to think it is okay to be lazy with words and for literary writers to think it is okay to be lazy with story.

What about commercial writers who think it is okay to be lazy with story? Hate to trot out Fifty Shades for this, but there you go.

In other stuff:

• A teacup whirlpool is being stirred in India over whether photocopying of textbooks will kill their publishers. An on-campus copy shop in Delhi University apparently drew the ire of several big publishers over photocopied material from some of their textbooks.
• These famous quotes are grammatically incorrect - but only technically. Linguistic perfection is seemingly overrated when the message is the most important thing. Thoughts?
• Books are said to be reviewed in The New York Times at the reviewers' own discretion - and that's the system. Probably the same story elsewhere.
• How to write about nature. Probably not like how Nabokov does it.
• The nine ways big publishers are like Big Pharma.
• The Hitler diary hoax - how did it happen?
• Words like "penmanship" and "fisherman" are gender-biased? For the love of...
• Here's one question every new writer asks and wants answers to: "Am I good enough?" The next question then, is: "Do I wanna be 'good enough'?"

News: Farmers And Some Boring Stuff

After the deluge of interesting news last week, things seem to be slowing down. Really slowing down. Or maybe I just feel that there's really nothing of note. Last week was also a downer, what with bombings, earthquakes and the rise of 'independent' candidates for GE13.

One would think that Feedly could help find more bookish stuff to highlight.

---

Urban women in US apparently flocking to greenmarkets hoping to get down and dirty with farmers. A natural progression, I suppose, after hot chefs.

...a 6-foot-1, strapping-but-married dairy farmer — a grandfather — tells of a barrage of texts sent from an all-too-regular customer, a green-eyed beauty in her 40s who was eager to milk their exchanges for more.

We could really have some fun if you weren’t married, read the first sext. Then came: Are you going to be at USG this weekend? What are you doing after the market today? Do you need somewhere to stay in the city?

Milking exchanges with a dairy farmer for more... love the phrasing. But OMG WATS WITH DAT PIC.

Well, it's interesting reading, isn't it?


Also:

• A review of Michael Pollan's Cooked. It's more than applying fire or fermentation to a bunch of ingredients.
• Tips on building a library on the cheap. Maybe #11 could be, "social networks"? People junk books all the time.
• Miranda Richardson, actress and this year's chair for the Women's Prize for fiction, takes a hard swing at tall poppy syndrome in the UK. Meanwhile, Gaby Woods reminds us of another poppy who should be allowed to flourish.
• Do you read author interviews to glean writers' tricks from them? There may be no such holy grail.
• Has modern religion become a MacGuffin? A Q&A with author (and possible heretic) Peter Rollins about his book and how "'God' has fallen prey to our grasping, market-driven existence — just another shiny thing we acquire to make ourselves feel OK."
• Randy Susan Meyers wonders whether readers owe writers $#!+. Of course they don't, but that doesn't stop some writers from being pushy. Self-promotion can go too far, like this author who thinks he may have 'predicted' the bombing of the Boston Marathon.

More News: Ink, Steak, Tweeting 'Turk' And Inside The Kindle

• Ancient ink says "Gospel of Judas" is "most likely authentic". Feel like some Lady Gaga now.
• Of these ten ways self-publishing has changed world of books, not sure if "self-publishing brings happiness".
• A 'letter' to Filipino immigrants from a Filipino writer: "We'll be here if you want to read us." Dawww. If not for the Filipino hacks (and their emotion-stirring eloquence) hating on us over Sabah I'd be all teary-eyed.
• Of these eleven stories of book burning, most were perpetrated by warmongers and religious fanatics.
• Cats reign on the Internet, while dogs rule in print. Two schools of thought on the matter: one involves attention spans, the other, human narcissism.
• A profile of the People's Recreation Community, a tiny Hong Kong bookstore that holds a trove of books banned in China, illustrates (as if it's not obvious by now) just how futile book bans are.
• Is English spelling is 'so messed up'? Doesn't feel that way to me.
• I'm OK, you're okay, we're all O.K. The most annoying or blah non-word began as a joke and took on a life of its own. Is it among history's first memes?
• When I Was A Kid II headed for Kickstarter. Is it too early to book a copy?
• Jason Merkoski, former Kindle development team leader, dishes on e-books, personal data, and Amazon. His inside story on the Kindle was serialised in The Huffington Post: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
• Picking up Mahir "I Kiss You!" Çağrı's baton is the Twitter feed of a London-based Turkish restaurant. I'm not sure if the mind(s) behind the edgy, witty Tweets are actual Turks or local sockpuppets. Feel free to follow them, but no kisses - they have knives.
• Steak is "manly"? Try some blood in a gourd cleaned with cow piss, like AA Gill says he did. Apparently it's the same. Gill goes on to write more about steak, which reminds me: I haven't eaten that in years.

Return To Nambawan

Generally I make it a point to never review the same place twice; every time I return to a place it has folded, become an entirely different shop, or remains the same. Nambawan Restaurant and Café is the latter.

I don't know if I'll ever do something similar to this, but it wasn't too long ago that I wrote two pieces about the same establishment within two weeks. It helped that the other place had slightly different characters during different times of the day. ...I don't think the Three Little Pigs/Big Bad Wolf needs any more endorsements, do you?

Thing is, Nambawan did nothing to warrant a second write-up - maybe other than sticking around and still doing what they do. Which is the only thing my makan kaki and I wish for all restaurants. Can't ask any more than that.

---

Nambawan — Part Deux

first published in The Malaysian Insider, 15 April 2013


That newspaper clipping is still there. I snapped a photo of it on impulse. Melody was tickled by that, as was the manageress of the place.

What memories.

The quality of Nambawan's roast pork belly is recession-proof

We have been to a number of eateries over the years, some of which folded within several years since our last visit. A couple of those had become second homes, which made their closure all the more depressing. Invariably, they were all moms-and-pops; franchises were only for convenience, not conviviality.

Over two years ago, Melody was introduced to Nambawan Restaurant by a fellow Ipohite and more well-travelled food crawler. The owner, it seems, just decided to set up shop at Sri Manja Square One. Nambawan's gruff, taciturn chef (‘kay, I was scared of him) had worked in New Zealand for a time.

In spite of the humble décor and bad copywriting ("Taste your sense to infinity"?), we were struck by the price-to-portion ratio—affordable, even by the neighborhood's standards. The portions aren't really that big, so one can sample up to two or three items. On top of that, the chef's pretty skilled.

Burger that's 50 per cent pork + 50
per cent bacon equals 100 per cent
satisfaction

Everything we tried: the amatriciana pasta, the signature stone-charbroiled pork belly, and the 100 per cent home-made pork burger, was good and made just right. They had a 100 per cent home-made beef burger for a while, starring a patty said to be made of hand-chopped tenderloin.

Suffice to say that Nambawan has a good week-day menu, but fans and first-timers alike will look forward to the weekend specials. These include favourites such as roast pork belly, maybe lamb shank, and two other items.

You never know what might turn up. On our "homecoming" to this place, they also served a Tex-Mex pulled pork dish and a "50% pork + 50% bacon burger."

"50+50 burger?" Melody gasped. She was a bigger sucker for bacon than I was, so that's what she ordered. "Hold the fries and add more coleslaw," she added.

I stuck with the familiar roast pork belly, which is really a Western-style strip of siew yoke. We thought we could slip in a carbonara if there was enough room.

My order hit the table first. I felt a bit deflated. Inflation seems to have crept up on this little corner of Taman Sri Manja. The pork belly looked a bit smaller than the last time I ate it, and there was one less half-a-potato.

One bite restored my hopes for his place. Oh, yes... that's how I remembered it. The roasted pork skin was dense, so I applied more pressure on the fork. Glistening, semi-transparent fat oozed out from various crannies as I cut another piece of belly.

The shiitake mushroom soup is so
good you'd want to lick the bowl...
but please don't

The lean parts had flavour, the fatty bits were silky and unctuous, and the partly caramelised skin was crispy and chewy in turns. I had little use for the sweet apple sauce meant to balance the richness of the meat, which I'd rather pair with the lovely light-brown sauce covering the spuds.

The second half of the main event began when Melody's 50% pork/50% bacon burger arrived. Instead of devouring it the conventional way, she deconstructed the dish with knife and fork, eating each component as she saw fit.

I leaned in as Melody sliced into the patty, which was large for a RM9.90 burger, and released the familiar smell of cured meat, fat and salt. I almost swooned. She "mmm"-ed in appreciation of the flavour and the genius behind it. "Why didn't anybody else think of this before?" she gushed.

In between bites of belly, Melody slipped me a few pieces of her bacon-enhanced patty. How to describe the fine balance of textures between fresh and cured meat, the mingling of the flavours and the smoky sharp tang of salt that gets people begging for more, despite the health hazards?

I gave up and just surrendered to the sensations.

"'You must try this'," Melody supplied as she mentally drafted a sales pitch for her Facebook update. Trust her to come up with the pithiest lines.

"So, got room for carbonara?" I later asked, after I wiped my mouth.

Melody pondered it briefly, and shook her head. I thought as much.

Madam Yap the manageress had different ideas, however.

"Would you like a little soup?" she asked. "Made with shiitake mushrooms. It tastes great. You'll love it."

We exchanged wary looks. Why not? Soup's more manageable than a carbonara.

"Just a bit," Melody pleaded, just in case.

What arrived was a normal portion of light brown not-very-runny and somewhat hearty shiitake mushroom soup. The chunks were finer and the broth was so ... yes, this is how you do Western-style shiitake mushroom soup.

When the soup was gone, I looked around to see if it was safe to lick the bowl. Across the table, Melody glared at me as I ran a finger all over the inside of the bowl and sucked up what it had collected.

You'd think the chef would be chuffed, Mel.

I know I was.

---

Nambawan Restaurant and Café

10, Jalan PJS3/48
Sri Manja Square One
Taman Sri Manja
6½ Miles, Off Old Klang Road
46000 Petaling Jaya

Non-halal

Lunch: 12pm-3pm
Dinner: 6pm-10pm

Closed every other Monday

+6016-224 1533 (Yap)
+6013-263 2772 (Gilbert)

Facebook page

News: Modern Mythology, Self-Help, Yelp Help, And Amazon

Indian mythology is being 'updated' in contemporary Indian fiction - and making authors rich and famous. Is the evolution worth it?

Readers who grew up with the idea that Ravana was a through-and-through bad guy, for instance, will be surprised to learn that he was the son of a sage and was a devout worshipper of Shiva who knew that the bad things he did had some purpose in balancing the cosmic books (the way I see it).

Modern audiences have no patience for such complicated accounting, so the dynamics between protagonists and anatgonists were distilled into a more familiar black-and-white thing they can relate to. That'll move copies, I'm sure, but will this mean the ability to understand nuance and navigate different shades of grey will eventually be sacrificed?

I have issues with the behaviour of some sages, the so-called brahmins - particularly their sense of entitlement and demand for respect. That sage mentioned in the Ramayana who cursed Shakuntala when she did not greet him because she was daydreaming about her beloved? You'd think he'd understand. Cursing people out of anger is not what people expect of learned, enlightened beings.

If there's a story where sages get punished for such behaviour, I'd read that.

---

A restaurant critic lists 11 reasons why Yelp reviews suck, plus 11 fixes for that.

Some reasons include making "unfair judgments or poor decisions based on ignorance of the restaurant’s cuisine, level of formality, intentions, or audience" (thinking of you here, Brad Newman), "no understanding of how restaurants work", "a lack of human empathy", "an undue sense of entitlement" (hello again, Brad Newman) and "unreasonable expectations on whether the restaurant can accommodate special dietary preferences."

---

Self-help by women for women: Why do they seek advice for everything under the sun from strangers? What's wrong with that?

Nothing, if you're seeking practical instruction on practical problems: how to fix your bike, prepare your taxes, or roast a leg of lamb. Practical problems can be quantified. Personal or existential challenges are idiosyncratic and resistant to formulaic fixes; they require retail, made to measure therapy. One size doesn't fit all.

Which is probably why we'll continue to see more of the same in bookstores for the foreseeable future.

---

Russell Brand remembers Margaret Thatcher. Not how I'd imagine Russell Brand remembering Margaret Thatcher. One choice bit:

Barack Obama interestingly said in his statement that she had "broken the glass ceiling for other women." Only in the sense that all the women beneath her were blinded by falling shards.

And another:

The blunt, pathetic reality is that a little old lady has died, who in the winter of her life had to water roses alone under police supervision. If you behave like there's no such thing as society, in the end there isn't. Her death must be sad for the handful of people she was nice to and the rich people who got richer under her stewardship. It isn't sad for anyone else.

Read the whole thing. G*d. Did he actually write all that?

---

Shades of Amazon eats Goodreads? Academic publisher Elsevier buys social media research platform Mendeley. The app that allowed academics to share material was developed by several PhD students who wanted an easier way to manage research papers and collaborate with colleagues overseas.

Mendeley users cried foul over the move, because this means that Elsevier can dictate the terms of usage and access on what was said to be an open resource. A report in The Bookseller has details about the purchase and why this could be bad:

Many expressed sceptism over whether Mendeley will remain open since Elsevier gained a reputation for being against open access to research as it supported the failed anti-piracy legislation Stop Online Piracy Act.

And why did Amazon buy Goodreads? To get, it is said, into the heads of a small segment of "super readers", those who read a dozen or more books in a year. Not Malaysians in general, then. Forbes outlines the benefits Amazon can expect to reap from the purchase.

---

Seems Thai publishers are spreading their wings, but may have problems with publishing requirements in other countries.

Some foreign publishers also have special needs, she said, mentioning a request from publishers in Muslim-majority Malaysia for illustrators to adjust certain drawings.

"So the illustrators had to remove pigs and references to pork from drawings in certain books plus any related text. They were also asked to depict character wearing only clothes which are in line with Islamic dress codes," [Chonrungsee Chalermchaikit, vice-president of the Publishers and Booksellers Association of Thailand (Pubat)] explained.

While certain sensibilities should be respected, that respect should be reciprocal. Telling foreign publishers that their culture may raise hackles in your own country is kind of, well, bad to say the least.

---

In the Washington Post, an editor's dilemma when proofing copy:

Kind of humiliating: To copy edit review, just had to type "justin bieber shirtless london" into Google.....

Ron Charles ‏@RonCharles • 08 April 2013

I knowww. The things editors do when fact-checking.

---

Amazon reverses refusal to handle Cornish text in children's book. Will Google flip on 'ogooglebar'?

While Cornish-speakers and language activists worldwide were happy with the U-turn, not everyone feels Amazon was totally wrong, wrong, wrong. Somebody pointed out that it was merely business. "For one thing, only 500 people cited Cornish as their primary language in the 2011 census. Is it so shocking Amazon wasn’t all that interested in publishing the Cornish title?"

News: Restaurant Criticism, Cultural Boycott, And Court Battle

The restaurant critic's "perverse secret agenda" is not about getting free food, it seems, but to map "uncharted territories for the benefit of the hungry." So, no point in blogging about a place that's been reviewed n+1 times, then.

Premised around Pete Wells's takedown of a Guy Fieri restaurant, the piece also includes a look at the person The Awl says was the first restaurant reviewer who, bien sûr, happens to be French.

---

Iain Banks on why he's supporting a cultural boycott of Israel. Paragraph is split for easier reading:

The particular tragedy of Israel's treatment of the Palestinian people is that nobody seems to have learned anything. Israel itself was brought into being partly as a belated and guilty attempt by the world community to help compensate for its complicity in, or at least its inability to prevent, the catastrophic crime of the Holocaust.

Of all people, the Jewish people ought to know how it feels to be persecuted en masse, to be punished collectively and to be treated as less than human. For the Israeli state and the collective of often unlikely bedfellows who support it so unquestioningly throughout the world to pursue and support the inhumane treatment of the Palestinian people – forced so brutally off their land in 1948 and still under attack today – to be so blind to the idea that injustice is injustice, regardless not just on whom it is visited, but by whom as well, is one of the defining iniquities of our age, and powerfully implies a shamingly low upper limit on the extent of our species' moral intelligence.

---

This came in this afternoon, with several minor errors (which should be corrected already):

ZI Publications Sdn Bhd and its director Mohd Ezra Mohd Zaid have been given the nod by the Federal Court here today to challenge the constitutionality of a Selangor state religious enactment which restrict[s] freedom of expression.

Chief Justice Tun Arifin Zakaria[,] presiding a five-member panel[,] unanimously granted leave to the publishing company and Mohd Ezra who have filed a petition seeking the Federal Court to declare invalid Section 16 of the Syariah Criminal Enactment 1995.

..."It would be an interesting case to hear," said the Chief Justice...

Yes, it's about that book.

On a related note, someone sheds some light on censorship in Malaysia.


Other stuff:

• A call from 'God' and the travails of writing a New York Times book review. One important lesson: Don't junk your galley proofs until the review is published. To be safe, wait for a week after publication (my rule of thumb).
• Ten terms for various parts of a book, in case one needs to dissect a copy. I've been looking for #7 (head-piece/vignette) for ages.
• Andrew Zimmern and Tony Bourdain chat about fatherhood, creative freedom, etc - and Winnie the Pooh (warning: spoiler ahead for those who haven't read it).
• Among this selection of ten very expensive typos includes a US$80 million hyphen, an extra letter that costs US$1.4 milion, and a boo-boo that cost a Japanese security firm US$340 million (Itai!). Who says typos aren't important?
• Book promotion strategies that (allegedly) worked for these people. Best (and often-ignored) advice: "Writing a good book."
• Writers' letters may reveal certain things about them, but do you want to know?
• Seven myths and three truths about book editing might help improve the overall quality of books.
• How editors can be more 'conversational' on Twitter. But should editors be more social, given the nature of their work? And do editors want to be more social?
• Another 'next indie success story' fizzles out - or does it?
• Can't move from journalism to fiction and creative non-fiction? Here's some advice.

See You At The Movies - Maybe

For a while I've only heard of Roger Ebert (1942-2013); I'm no movie fan so I thought little of giving what he wrote a pass.

Then he comes up with a treatise on how to cook stuff in a rice pot, a teaser of which I'd stumbled upon while drifting aimlessly across the Web.

The eloquence. The use of words. The inner me hung its head in shame as he extemporised the many things that a rice pot and a few utensils can do for "you, student in your dorm room. You, solitary writer, artist, musician, potter, plumber, builder, hermit. You, parents with kids. You, night watchman. You, obsessed computer programmer or weary web-worker." He could've added, "You, lazy-ass wannabe journo/reviewer."

The power of that inspiring, mouth-watering piece on the rice pot is amplified when I heard that he'd written it after he lost his lower jaw and couldn't eat any more. It was the closest I had come to tearing up over a stranger's plight (though it didn't seem so) and he kicks the knife in by sucking it up, cancer and all, and continue to do his work.

"Yes, sir," Inner-Me mumbled, scuffing its heels on the ground. "Yes ... yes ... Yes, sir. Yes, I understand, sir. 'Get off my lazy ass and grab a rice cooker'? Right away, sir."

I've never read anything substantial from him since. Nor did I grab that pot, despite the temptation. For the nth time, I've seen someone else do something I want to and can do but can't because of age, experience, cred, platform, lack of a Pulitzer, etc.

For the nth minus 1 time, I wished I'd begun writing in earnest when I was, say, 20 instead of 32; I could have 'made it' by now - or next year the latest.

I could vent and rave like nobody's business and people would take me seriously. They'd send me places, and I'd write it up so that people would go there in droves, lemming-like, even if they had to sell their kidneys for airfare.

But this is Malaysia, where you won't be noticed unless you write about politics. And one year in real journalism revealed my lack of a stomach for the kind of things a journo has to do to feed himself. Also, why-lah are the powers that be sooo sensitive?

So I cut my teeth reviewing books and eating places, and the occasional movie or music album. No way I can offend anyone when writing things that won't be read.

...Right, I did offend some people. Not discussing that here, though.

At some point, I buried my dreams of a Pulitzer and the like, and just write and write and write. But not enough, I feel. I've so many things left unsaid. Never mind writing - I'd just stop living if I'd ended up like Ebert in his final years. On top of it all, I'll never be 'good' or 'qualified' enough to criticise or call out certain things.

One glimmer of hope came in John Scalzi's obit of Ebert where he pointed out (emphasis mine):

...as passionate as he was about film, he wasn’t precious about it. Ebert loved film, but what I think he loved most of all was the fact that it entertained him so. He loved being entertained, and he loved telling people, in language which was direct and to the point (he worked for the Sun-Times, the blue collar paper in town) what about the films was so entertaining. What he taught me about film criticism is that film criticism isn’t about showing off what you know about film, it was about sharing what made you love film.

I don't know if I'll ever see you at the movies, Mr Ebert (I'm Asian, we don't do the first-name thingy with our elders), but "sharing what made you love [whatever]"? That I can do. And I'll continue to do it until I 'get there', where I can, among other things, slice and dice like a conscientious, knowledgeable pro.

Though I wasn't with you on your journey, I'd love to see you off. Hope you don't mind.

And thank you, sir, for everything.

Masterclass In Session: Modelling With Amber

A series of Masterclass books was planned for release by MPH Publishing. Essentially, how-to guides from homegrown experts in their respective fields. For the first book in the series, we have this.

Among the first responses were, "Love the hair." But of course.

In this country, her name is synonymous with the term "supermodel".

"I did not know a thing about modelling when I started out as a teenager. I wish there was a school or a guidebook that I could have referred to back then," says Amber Chia. "I managed to set up a modelling academy a few years back and now, I'm so happy that I can also produce a guidebook to help aspiring models."

And here's the guidebook: Amber Chia's Guide to a Successful Modelling Career, the first book in the new MPH Masterclass Series.

Full of advice for young women keen on pursuing a modelling career in Malaysia and beyond, this guide covers such topics as self-assessment, modelling platforms, building one's professional attitude and personal branding, avoiding scams, other employment opportunities, and much more.

Amber also shares her own journey, from her childhood in Tawau, Sabah when she daydreamed about a modelling career to winning the Guess international ambassadorship, an event that put her on the path to where she is today. Helping readers follow that journey are a selection of photographs from her photoshoots, events and ads.

It is mainly aimed at helping aspiring models get a leg up when embarking on their career on the catwalk, and beyond - the kind that the author wished she'd had when she was starting out.

Much of the tips and advice she gives: what (and what not) to wear, how to build a portfolio, how to socialise and get your name out, steer clear of dodgy agencies and gigs, be nice to everyone (because, as Tyra Banks once said, "We don't like mean girls"), and so on are all common sense.

Too bad common sense seems unrecognisable these days unless it's pointed out to you, featured on 'inspirational' posters, and posted on Facebook - or compiled into guides like this one.

We hope the masses will be thrilled with this new arrival at all major bookstores - including ours - after its launch on Wednesday, 03 April 2013.

Print versions are going for RM35.90 a copy, while e-book versions will soon be available from MPH Digital.

If one is still not sure how to go about being a catwalk superstar after finishing the book, there's always the Amber Chia Academy.

---

Amber Chia's Guide to a Successful Modelling Career

Amber Chia
MPH Group Publishing
146 pages
Non-fiction
ISBN: 978-967-415-107-2

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News: Meet The Gardener, And Goodreads Gets Amazoned

Aren't we all still chuffed over Tan Twan Eng's Man Asia win? Meet the man himself at Kinokuniya, KLCC on Saturday, 06 April at 7:30pm where he'll be signing copies of his winner, The Garden of Evening Mists.

Take your pick from several publishers, 'cause you can't have too many

I suppose if you already have a copy lying around you can get that signed, too.

What else?

• ZOMG the jungle of a company known as Amazon has swallowed Goodreads. Cyberspace echoed with the dismay of legions, some of whom have announced their intent to sign off Goodreads for good. Others say nothing will change, while a few were like, "Oh, and this is surprising how?"
  
  There's talk that this so-called independent book readers' social network will end up sending everyone to Amazon to buy recommended reads because, well, GR people are real readers and less likely to indulge in sockpuppetry and all that. You think?
• "Most contemporary literary fiction is terrible." Too bad the author doesn't elaborate any further than 'because too many people are doing it, and doing it wrong'.
• William Shakespeare, one-percenter? Okay, that was a bad attempt at rhyming - and not to say that all one-percenters are tax dodgers, which was what was allegedly uncovered about ol' Bill. It's also said he'd hoarded grain for the lean times but made a profit by selling some at jacked-up prices.
• Whoops: Unattributed, borrowed passages found in Jane Goodall's Seeds of Hope, some of which were from Wikipedia. It's like Michel Houellebecq and The Map and the Territory all over again.
• Amish fiction? Hmm. Amish romance? SNRK. I mean, come on. "Bonnet-rippers"? I suppose the sight of tumbling locks freed from some flimsy headgear has a certain kind of appeal for some....
• When writers flog themselves, what do they sound like?
  
  

  Anne Enright berates herself for punctuation tics ("I am tormented by my need for commas"). Richard Ford is unable to "describe how people look". Tessa Hadley admits to repeating images. Neil Jordan says he has written "a thousand beginnings" but few become finished projects. Ruth Padel convicts herself of "too-muchness", writing too much and overdoing imagery.

  
  There. Don't they sound more like you and me already?

Wise Guys

Easter, Sunday, 2013: This review struggled to find a home for a while, mainly because of the novel's premise. It ended up in TMI, on Good Friday, no less. I'd only realised this belatedly. Was this why it briefly ended up as an editor's pick?

Anyway, Happy Easter, Malaysia.

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Wise guys

What if the "three kings" were "three thugs"? For one, there'd be more action

first published in The Malaysian Insider, 29 March 2013


Seth Grahame-Smith's darker retelling of the Nativity took me by surprise. I actually liked it – though I knew from just the title and synopsis that I would.

The story of the three magi should be a familiar one. As the ages roll by, however, many chapters in history tend to become apocryphal – outa punya cerita.

Did these three kings really exist, and are they enshrined in the Cologne Cathedral in Germany? Or is there something else behind the tale?

Grahame-Smith shakes things up a little by suggesting that the Biblical Magi are not really nobles or holy men at all, but a trio of criminals on the run who just so happened to be at the right place at the right time.

This is the premise of Unholy Night, his latest work after Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

The protagonist and appointed leader of the fabled "magi" is Balthazar, a thief and murderer who's also known as the Antioch Ghost.

Attempting to escape the law, he's captured and imprisoned in the dungeons of King Herod in Jerusalem, along with two other thieves, Gaspar and Melchyor.

Being the most experienced and resourceful of the three, Balthazar successfully springs them all from jail.

Their escape enrages Herod but the sickly king's attention is diverted by one of his advisors towards a window.

Outside, the Star of Bethlehem is shining brightly, announcing the birth of the prophesied Saviour – and the beginning of the slaughter of the firstborns.

While escaping from Jerusalem, the three thieves witness the killings and are stunned into silence. Horror gives way to righteous fury. The result: some dead Judean soldiers and a wounded Balthazar.

Learning of the encounter, Herod sends a letter to the Roman emperor, who dispatches a real magician to deal with the holy child and his bodyguards, along with a young Pontius Pilate, who would preside over a famous trial years later.

Though it feels more true-to-life, Grahame-Smith retains some supernatural elements.

A wounded and unconscious Balthazar sees visions of a "Man with Wings" (Gabriel the Messenger?) and a wise old man who tells him to escort Joseph and Mary and their child to Egypt.

A swarm of locusts comes to their rescue at one point. When the magician shows that he's the real thing, Herod sees possibilities, including a cure for his disease and freedom from his position as a Roman satrap.

Also, other serendipitous events related to Balthazar's own troubled past explains why he uncharacteristically decided to protect the holy child.

His revenge sub-plot, which involves an old flame, brings out a sympathetic side to his generally unsavoury character that compels you to root for him.

"Stick it to him there! It'll hurt more!"

I found almost nothing to complain about. The pages practically turn themselves, and the cinematic feel of the novel screams, "Make a film out of me!" Grahame-Smith is – surprise, surprise – also a screenwriter and film and TV producer.

Some may find the portrayal of Mary in this novel a trifle unsettling, though. Balthazar initially scoffed at the immaculate conception thing and suggests a more earthly reason for Mary's pregnancy and gets an earful from the young and unexpectedly assertive, feisty new mom.

We know what happens to Joseph, Mary and their child.

We know what happens to Herod and Pilate. But it's what happens to the three "magi" at the end of Grahame-Smith's Unholy Night that makes it a satisfying read.

Those Christmas carols and Nativity scenes will never sound or feel the same.


This review was based on a complimentary advance reading copy.

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Unholy Night

Seth Grahame-Smith
Grand Central Publishing (April 2012)
307 pages
Fiction
ISBN: 978-1-4555-1617-9