Ah, Cats

Interesting creatures, cats. Carefree, cuddly, nice to have around, they're a favourite choice for people who want a low-maintenance animal companion. There's a reason why they're so low-maintenance.

Cats are built to kill. Agile and nimble, with sharp retractable claws, silent footsteps, quick reflexes and excellent night vision, they are the ninjas of the animal kingdom. (In an English suburb, domesticated house cats that have been allowed to roam freely at night actually threatened the local bird and rodent population.)

There have been reports of pet cats "sharing" their kills with their owners. If it's happened to you, it's no compliment. Cats are predators, and hunting skills mean a lot to them. It's their way of saying, "Hey, here's my catch of the night, you bald useless ape of a den-mate. When are you going to start pulling your weight?"

Because of their self-sufficiency and excellent survival skills, cats are solitary by nature (who needs humans, anyway?) - unlike dogs, who are much better at schmoozing.

So action, right? It has every right to be - it's an efficient and effective hunter. (Why do you think Jessica Alba's Dark Angel was spliced with cat genes?)

When you meet a sweet, mewling, cuddly furball of a kitten however, your heart melts and you'll forget all that I've just told you.

Ah, cats. Eat your hearts out, fellow humans.