Much Ado Over Masala Chai

When I think of tea, specifically the chai kind of tea, I'm reminded of the opening scene in Hindi film Dil Se, and vice versa.

In it, Shah Rukh Khan plays a journalist who ends up at at train station as a storm whips up. The wind tears away the shawl of another waiting passenger sleeping on a bench, who turns out to be Manisha Koirala.

Enraptured, Khan's character tries to flirt with her. When she asks for a cup of tea, he runs off and wakes up a sleeping chaiwalla nearby, entreating him to make two cups of the best, sweetest tea he can muster because "my future depends on it."

...Have your eyes stopped rolling? Good.

Of course, the train pulls away with Manisha inside while Khan stands in the rain like an idiot as fat drops of roof dribble splash into the cups of tea he's holding and as he stares wistfully at the long-gone train, he drinks one of them. Cue the first song, Chaiyya Chaiyya - which I'm not making puns on.

That scene stayed with me like a persistent suitor in a Bollywood film. Can you think of a better advertisement for whatever tea he was drinking? I believe the brand wasn't shown. Major missed opportunity.

One day, someone on Twitter made this claim: "...every 'chai blend' in American supermarkets is inferior to Wagh Bakri tea + milk + anything you have on your spice rack". Those who know this person would know she would know.

I've seen some of these Western-manufactured chai blends. Mine might be similarly outrageous.

A cursory search online revealed that this brand has some history, a part of which veers towards myth. The founder, Narandas Desai, started a tea estate in South Africa but then:

...racial discrimination forced him to return to India with nothing but a few valuables and a certificate from Mahatma Gandhi for being the most honest and experienced tea estate owner in South Africa.

Back in India, Desai established the Gujarat Tea Depot Company in 1919, and in 1925 he launched the Wagh Bakri brand, whose logo has a tiger and a goat flanking a cup of tea. Incidentally, wagh and bakri is Gujarati for "tiger" and "goat" respectively. Tea so good even mortal foes would set aside their differences over it, in line with the founder's aim to foster harmony, like Gandhi would.

And just how huge is Wagh Bakri in India? This huge:

No one can touch it in Gujarat, where over 50 per cent of the tea consumed is Wagh Bakri. And it sells enough in Rajasthan, Madhya Pradesh, Andhra Pradesh, Mahrashtra, Goa, Delhi, Hyderabad, Chhattisgarh and Karnataka to be the largest brand in the country outside of the HUL and Tata fold.

To reiterate, the biggest tea brand in India is literally called Tiger/Goat and its ethos is apparently Gandhi-inspired. Of such stuff are legends made.

As luck would have it, a mini mart nearby is a one-stop shop for many things from the Indian subcontinent such as Bru Coffee, dried round chillies, and even asafoetida. But the only tea leaves from that brand were in teabags, so I settled for a box of tea dust. As it's imported, it seems expensive compared to local brands of the same weight.

I was warned that Wagh Bakri tea was strong and hoo boy, the aroma that boiled out when I opened the foil package. Just the kind of product that's said to be tailored to "blend with the milk's richness and make its presence, and flavour, felt." I might need to store it in a proper airtight container soon or risk losing the oomph.

I only used one teaspoon of tea dust for the masala chai I made one evening. I roasted and coarsely ground some whole spices: black peppercorns, several "petals" of star anise, two cloves, one cardamom pod, and a pinch of fennel seeds. All these went in before the tea, followed by a pinch of Ceylon cinnamon and about a quarter teaspoon of ginger powder.

If you're grinding the whole spices down to a powder, you won't need much. An acquaintance now residing in India says this is excessive for masala chai and I didn't even throw in a pinch of nutmeg. One of these days, perhaps.

One sip, then two, and I swear, from far away, a familiar voice crooned:

♪ Jinke sar ho~ ishq ki chaa~on
Paa~on ke neeche~ jaanat ho~gi
Jinke sar ho~ ishq ki chaa~on ♫

Oh my.

The box is expensive, about RM11, but it'll last me awhile. And as my sieve couldn't catch the finest bits of dust, there was no bottoms up for me. But I managed to find a little-used coffee sock for the next cup.

Pity the packets of local tea in the cabinet, which I'm now using in experiments with cold-brewed teh-C kosong. Steeping it in milk makes for a bodier brew, but I'd have to use more tea than usual, which I'm reluctant to do with the costlier Indian import. Though the colour is lighter than hot-brewed chai but requires less sweetening, I still find cold-brewing tea with milk wasteful, even with cheaper stuff.

But on some days, getting heat involved is tedious, not to mention having to roast, pound and grind the spices, wait for the beverage to cool down, and properly dispose of the strained-out bits instead of flushing them all down the sink.

I suppose if you need to enjoy a cup of spicy, warming and soothingly Zen-inducing masala chai, the brewing process should be meditative rather than a chore.

Hence, you need chill to chai.

Though I'd broken a half-year coffee fast, I've stopped my regular coffee intake, limiting it to the odd cup or two a week with only one shot of espresso, and switched to chocolate, tea, and the occasional haldi ka doodh (turmeric milk) to cope with life.

I wouldn't mind another six months without coffee if I had tea like this.

Over the years I must have chugged down litres of good and bad coffee under stress, which I guess borked my body clock and forced me to give up on caffeinated beverages - proof that you can't take things for granted, like your health and tolerance for certain foods.

Speaking of which, I might need to find another supplier of Wagh Bakri tea, just in case.

Traffic Laws Are For Everybody

Lax enforcement and perceived vulnerability have allowed motorcyclists to run red lights and ride between lanes, etc., with impunity sebab miskin, kasi chan-lah, and so on. But when they screw up they affect more than themselves.

Arguably, many motorcyclists are B40 or thereabouts. So in a city ruled by cars (read: rich people), riding a bike through red lights, traffic jams and road dividers is a way to beat the system.

So it's no surprise some of them are upset when people suggest they obey traffic laws to the letter.

While the risk of being a motorcyclist on Malaysian roads is much higher, assuming that all motorists deliberately make life hell for bikers is almost as gross as the liberties bikers take because of protections afforded to them.

When their asshole behaviours - like kicking cars that don't give way to them - are called out, they challenge you to throw down at the nearest police station, or make it about race or class. How is this anything but ketuanan rempit?

Traffic laws tend to side with motorcyclists because chances of them dying or being disabled are high. And so many riders rack up so, so many citations on the road, they're likely to be let off - not worth the paperwork, perhaps?

But such laissez-faire enforcement and an environment where motorists end up paying for the mistakes of a gung-ho rider would seed a sense of entitlement and untouchability, which there is already too much of elsewhere.

No doubt Malaysians are awful road users. While I've seen some good sorts who give way to other motorists and allow bikes, ambulances and police cars a wide berth, it still fells like they're the exception, not the rule.

Not all car drivers are rich. Nor can they deal with the distress caused by a reckless biker. Scratched or dented side doors? "Kasi chan-lah!" Or "Mai settle kat balai!" Hit a bike that ran a red light? Dead or alive, your fault. That's fair?

Who has time for an earful about road safety and etiquette, the good fortune of the haves and the struggles of the have-nots, and the dangers of the ego from a motorcyclist who ran a red light and nearly collided into your car?

Traffic laws are for everybody. You can't pick and choose which to obey or break at your convenience, especially in situations where lives are at risk. You might be inconvenienced on occasion for toeing the line, but you'll live.

I'm still a fan of equal penalties for everybody, which I think is an effective short-term solution while we get our act together. Malaysians, among many other things, become more careful when money's involved.

True,the roads here are dangerous for motorcyclists. But motorcyclists can be awful too. However, we can all agree that nobody wants accidents. So can drivers and riders meet halfway on this to make our roads safer?

Bane Of The Broken Ballot

Parts of Twitterjaya erupted when the nascent #UndiRosak movement emerged to crow about the failures of the new government, calling it a vindication of their stand that neither BN nor PH can form a viable government and when forced to choose between two evils, pick neither.

They also seem to be anticipating a surge in spoilt votes now that the voting age has been lowered to 18, perhaps to allow more angry youths to partake in this sort of thing.

But how many voters take this crew seriously? And if this movement gains momentum, can we expect at least half the votes in the next general election to be spoilt? What if all the votes are?

For much of modern Malaysia's history, it's been ruled by one party for so long the rot has seeped in, in the form of corruption, lack of transparency in key decisions and spending, and flagrant abuse of power.

An election has become a game of numbers. Any political party, however altruistic, has to contest in this field according to the rules. Those who don't, lose out. And when an increasingly corrupt, paranoid and power-hungry incumbent is willing to use state machinery to hold on to power, what chance does an opposition have to change things?

A six-decade incumbency also means you have groups that have been disenfranchised from their country's development. Some are kept there with occasional crumbs or populist propaganda about how this is all they have and if they vote for anyone else "others" will take even that away. Others are told to "know your place" and "don't ask too much", or "go back to where you came from".

Bent and broken, these groups keep returning the same people to power, convinced that this will be their lot forever, and that any change will only be for the worse. And it'll be business as usual for the long-ruling incumbents.

Such is the democratic arena in Malaysia, where parties play for points and the downtrodden resignedly sigh "Change is for the rich" when told they can change their lives for the better through the ballot.

This is what #UndiRosak ends up perpetuating while waiting for the arrival of the right party to throw their weight behind, in the hope of changing the country for the better. Their idea of "better", that is.

Many have called them dangerously naive, not without reason. They seem to behave as if all Malaysian politicians care about their constituents and that spoilt votes will terrify them into contrition and make them do better. And if nothing changes, perhaps Malaysia should weather a few more election cycles with the old guard until "better" comes along.

Ha ha ha, nope. And nope.

Do they not sound like someone who will only wait for the right gym and right personal trainer to come along before starting a fitness regime?

Like a long-time couch potato, this country isn't as nimble or hale and hearty enough to adapt to global changes. We've left much of the heavy lifting to the elites, who by now is clear that they don't necessarily have its interests at heart.

A rotting structure is already weak and will degenerate faster, despite being under the same degree of stress. And when there are two evils, not voting for the lesser one will hasten the inevitable.

Fixing such a structure is taxing. Some things will have to be replaced. The transition will be long and painful. Yet we have quitters whining about how terrible the new government is and pledging to switch sides on the next general elections.

You mean, putting the old guard back in, warts and all? When they have demonstrated little to no worth as an opposition and are willing to stoop even lower to regain power, stifle dissent and cover up their tracks? You can hear their desperation screaming from recent headlines, like a banshee's portent of doom.

This country cannot afford to wait for "better". Undoing nearly six decades of damage might take twice as long. Many of my generation will probably be dead before the shift engendered on May 9 starts bearing fruit, but this country will still be around to reap the consequences of our choices now.

#UndiRosak ultimately encourages disillusionment and despair, especially among the "change is for the rich" crowd. People are trying to get them to make themselves heard in a meaningful way, so telling them to spoil their votes is like telling them to scream "We're not voting for anybody because they all suck!" into the void.

It accomplishes nothing, and their grievances are neither conveyed nor addressed. Contesting parties in general elections don't care because their die-hard supporters will vote regardless. In that sense, even voters with a destructive ethnoreligious bent understand the significance of their ballots and respect the election process.

If #UndiRosak wants to damage something, they could start - if they haven't already - by campaigning for local elections. Pockets of the disenfranchised throughout the country can be an intimidating force when empowered and gathered, which is probably why some people want them kept apart and under heel. People, to whom these groups are nothing but vote banks.

If they're sincere about fighting tyranny, they should begin by helping these groups gain some degree of autonomy. As long as they're dependent on federal or state authorities for essentials, these minorities will have no choice but to pick the side that lets them live.

What it would be like if the tables are turned isn't hard to imagine. Seeing the decisions made by some politicians of late, it doesn't look like they're in charge. The right thing is easy to do, so why isn't it being done in many cases?

Because much of the power is still in the wrong hands, and efforts to return that power to the right people will be resisted by those #UndiRosak might relish tripping up.

We've only begun to awaken to the potential of change and some have started grumbling about "the good old days". If the undecided and those who still hope to vote for change are persuaded to spoil their votes for the next elections, I can see only one outcome, and that scares all of those who rejoiced at the results of GE14.

Drug Abuse: Time For Another Approach

Critics are railing against the government's plan to decriminalise drug use. Predictably, the loudest and staunchest critics of the move are the more conservative ones. Of course they would. What else to expect from those who want to amputate the limbs of petty thieves as a deterrent?

"You're not punishing drug users any more? Drug use will explode!"

"Now everybody can shoot up!"

"The drug lords will be happy!"

Decriminalising drug use is not a free pass to use drugs. It must come with measures to deter relapses to be effective. If you're a user, the money they'd spend to try you in court and jail you will be used instead to detox your ass and send you back out to society. If you repeat the offence, well, good luck.

People who resort to drugs to cope with crap in their lives need help. Considering the state of local jails, locking them up will either break them or mould them into criminals of a worse stripe. Then there's the stigma of being an ex-convict, and as Malaysian society in general doesn't believe in mercy or second chances, they're going back to their old habits again.

Drugs will f— you up, but people who see them as a better alternative won't know that until it's too late. Penalties for users are almost as harsh as those for traffickers, which means they are reluctant to seek help - or snitch on their pushers.

Users, mules and peddlers are the most visible parts of the drug trade, so they're easier to catch and report on. Rarely do we see kingpins, manufacturers and their enforcers punished. More must be done to move against the latter bunch. They peddle misery and ultimately death. Among the worst are those who pretend to be friends with people and get them hooked on drugs to line their pockets.

Some will ask, "But wouldn't pushers pass themselves off as users when caught and get off the hook?" While some pushers are users, I doubt many are. People deal drugs to get rich quick and being your own best customer is a no-no. I doubt cola manufacturers would allow their kids near a bottle.

And who funds our prisons? Rather than jailing users, why not clean them up and return them to employment? Most, I feel, won't turn to drugs again after a stint at rehab. Every user jailed is out of the workforce and not contributing to society or tax coffers, and money is wasted on unnecessary prosecution and incarceration.

People who want the retention of heavy penalties only want to sleep better at night. I don't think they've ever been involved with or witnessed the effects of the drug trade. Because they don't see it, and with reports of the arrests, trials and executions of traffickers and mules, they think the laws and penalties are working.

"Only fools - and bad people - would get involved with drugs."

"Drug users and traffickers are bad for society. Hang them all."

"Problems? Be positive! Pray! Spend time with family! Why turn to drugs?"

People who bark this sort of thing tend to be unaware - or wilfully oblivious - that they're doing so from a position of privilege. Two major factors driving the drug trade are extreme poverty and crippling psychological problems - which they probably have never faced in their lives, or have the means to overcome.

Society needs to be less crappy and not rely on the government to wage war on drugs. We need to be less punitive and judgemental. While some willingly go into the drug trade, many who resort to it tend to do so out of desperation. Why punish or stigmatise the latter?

Killing or jailing mules and users might disrupt the trade, but there are far more suckers out there, and the suppliers can just go elsewhere. As long as the raw materials and the need for drugs is there, the suppliers will bounce back.

The big-stick approach to the war against drugs has been tried to death and hasn't really proved itself. Why not kill the trade with kindness? Bet that's never been tried in these parts before.

Saving addicts from their habit and keeping ex-addicts from relapsing will go much farther than merely punishing them. Their stories will serve as a deterrent - drugs are no solution to one's problems = and a message of hope for those struggling to overcome their addiction.

Dry

When the recent water supply disruption ended sooner than scheduled I was grateful. Then, last Saturday afternoon, I returned to dry taps.

Again.

Though supply was normal, it seems water isn't reaching the upper floors of my apartment block. The weekend was ruined.

Any time they announce a water supply disruption, I remember the drought in ... 1998, I think it was. Water was rationed, and neighbourhoods were grouped into zones with each zone taking turns to go dry for a few days.

I remember the nights I spent filling all the buckets I could when the taps ran, my blood running cold at the thought of another few days of a parched throat, an unwashed body, and no plumbing.

Twenty years later, it seems nothing was learnt or done about it. The Klang Valley is becoming more uninhabitable. Neighbourhoods suffer shorter water cuts every time a pipe bursts, whether from age or the actions of a clumsy contractor or pipe thief. Every burst or leaking pipe gives me the shivers.

Don't come at me with "at least we're not some other country where you don't see a drop for months". We are NOT that country. We ARE NOT supposed to be that country. It rains here, and frequently. Where is all that water going?

We could have nipped all this in the bud but we didn't. Why? And once this round of water cuts ends, will anything change?

It better, and fast. Twenty years from now I won't be in any condition to fill buckets in the middle of the night. Heck, the next major water rationing exercise in the Klang Valley might happen sooner.